Pizza for a knight

I ride my horse, as knights do, and I find a new path. Stone laid. So I took it. And went for pizza.
The pizza establishment was great. They tried this new topping i hadn't ever heard of before, "ham". Well, after 45 minutes of deliberation I thought I'd take a gamble and give this "ham" a go. Moments later I was introduced to a pizza expert. He advised me that pineapple was a good pairing of the meat. Well, as you could imagine I was taken aback. Tropical fruit and a farm yard animal on one culinary adventure, together?
An hour and a half passed before I agreed to this new fangled topping. "Yeah, what the hell!" I shouted into the kitchen, startling the chef and waitresses. I prepared myself for this meal to lessen the pain.
8 pints of mead later and I was ready for this monstrosity of a mad-culinary-scientist's creation. The waitress, acting as if nothing was weird about this whole thing, placed the pizza down in front of me and walked away, wishing me good luck, I'm sure. As I stared at the warm fruit and pink pieces of this "ham" people were talking about, I was immediately stricken with a hard case of 'pizza's remorse.' "What have I done?!"
I screamed into the heavens. Fruit and pig in the same bite. This was going to happen. A more sober man would have the guile and foresight to just walk away, but the mead coursing through my blood sat my rear firmly to the bar stool.
I picked up the first piece and closed my eyes and pictured a more sensible pizza. The pepperoni and extra cheese was on special, why didn't I just do that, I'd save some silver, too. Oh well. I've come this far. I didn't become a knight by running away from fruit. So i took a bite... then another, and another. "How can this be?!" I screamed in the face of an elderly woman. I grabbed two pieces and folded them together. I took another bite. "Amazing! There are wizards working at this gastronomy lab!" I shouted to the children already running away.
As I finished the entire pizza in record time, I danced out of there with a satisfying grin on my face. Back to the castle up the less rocky road to the rockier road. Now that I think back, I forgot to pay. Never the less, this is how my fist son's name came to be, "PineHample." My life would never be the same.

Time Lapse Sphere Technology

A boy appears out of now here. He's running down a rocky path in a dense, humid forest, carries a small black sphere.

Behind him, he's being chased by three men in suits. Their guns not of this world.

Back to the boy - he jumps over a hole, grabbing onto a hanging vine. He swings his 90 pound body forward and continues to run.

He twists the sphere. Presses a few buttons and it begins to light up.

The agents shoot.

A bullet hits the boys leg.

He drops. Hard. Presses two more buttons on the sphere. And an out pour of blue light emits from the sphere.

The agents catch up to the boy. One shoots him in the head before the boy can speak.
"Too late."

The boy dies.

The sphere blinds the agents.

The boy runs down a rocky path, again.

The agents follow. Guns being loaded.

The boy takes a turn at the hole. Presses a few buttons on the sphere, and keeps running.

One agent takes a short cut. The other follows the boy.

They corner the boy.
He presses a few buttons on the sphere. it lights up. He disappears.
Back at the hole, he swings across and keeps running.

He finds his last resting spot.
The agents, confused, call in their failure. "We lost him."

The boy dials a few numbers on the sphere, and he's gone.

C-Tates to ruin Gambit movie!

C-Tate will be the new Gambit, thanks to Lauren Shuler Donner - who apparently knows nothing about casting, acting, X-Men, X-Men fans, Gambit, Channing Tatum, comic books, movies, fan base support, source material, or right choices. 

Magic Mike isn't Gambit. C-tate is Magic Mike, and that's the peak of his acting chops.

Gambit (Remy Le Beau) is a womanizing, card shark that puts kinetic energy into anything he touches, at will.  C-Tates is a gapped tooth moron - see the disconnect?

This is a lazy, dumb, irresponsible, illogical casting choice. Just cause he "really really wants to be Gambit" by no means says he should.

I can't picture C-Tate doing a French Cajun accent, and seeing him try will pull everyone out of the movie. I hope this flops. So hard that Lauren Shuler considers another career. I don't hate Tatum, but I hate him for this role.

Gambit has a huge role in the Age of Apocalypse - this ins't 21 Jump Street.
I hope the fans can come together to petition this removal of him in this movie. Much like 50 Shades of Grey did.

God help us all